Tired of Being Good - Benjy Ferree

Occasionally on here I’m going to commentate on various songs Benjy Ferree wrote in his Bobby Driscoll concept album called Come Back to the Five and Dime, Bobby Dee.

I was absolutely delighted to find out that someone had created their own art based on Bobby’s life, so I gave this album a listen.  I’ll be honest, it’s not the type of stuff I usually like, and some songs I couldn’t get into at all.  But it was a worthy effort, and I think Bobby would be proud of it!  So I’m going to elaborate some about it here….

The first song on the album is called “Tired of Being Good.”

The truth comes out when living the straight and narrow

Gossip queens better keep those eyes down low

Take them right off me and put them back on the preacher

As good as it ever will be a freeloader floating at sea

It doesn’t matter if they need me

A house divided

My conscience is a cricket every time I curse you know he writes me a ticket

No one can be free when tied and bound and moved by strings

I cut them down the preacher screams heavy weighs the burden of Brother Dee

I swear at him, the cricket sings

Heavy weighs the shoulders of Brother Dee

Oh brother come back home

Oh brother come back home

I’m tired of being good you know I want to be bad

But I cry when Jiminy won’t call my name

In the name of Lost Boys everywhere and Marilyn Jean

I don’t care if they don’t like me

But they’re still the very best

I don’t care if they don’t like me

But they’re still the very best

My conscience has experience every time I cut myself he stops the bleeding

And what good is freedom when rebellion becomes legal

I cut it down the eagle screams falling to its tomb in the bloody sea

Wendy Darling praying on her knees heavy weighs the burden of Brother Dee

Oh brother come back home

This song seems pretty self-explanatory – those of us who know Bobby’s history know he warred with being good vs. being bad as he got older.  Personally, I feel it’s never as black and white as a “good vs. bad” person, and I don’t feel Bobby was a bad person, ever.  He might have made some bad life choices, but there was still a light that seemed to emanate from Bobby’s spirit that apparently caused him not to want to stay “bad” indefinitely (he had been off drugs at least six months when he died, and coming off of opiates – particularly alone – is not for the faint of heart).  

Anyway, I digress.  To a young person such as he was at the time he made his decision to go “bad,” it probably was pretty black and white to him.  He had been a “good boy” for so long, and I think Ferree reminds us through the lines about Jiminy that Bobby’s conscience probably didn’t leave him alone the entire time he was behaving rebelliously.  

I also love the references Ferree gives to Bobby’s movie career (Wendy Darling and the Lost Boys) and also his personal life (Marilyn Jean).  I do wonder if the lyrics "It doesn't matter if they need me / A house divided" is meant to allude to his divorce...

This song perfectly sums up, I feel, the emotions that may have been present in Bobby’s mind and heart when he was a very young man.