Thoughts About "Lost Boy" - Ruth B

This isn't a great big post, just a random blurb that results from something I was thinking about the other day.

We've pretty much all probably heard the song by Ruth B that came into being last year, "Lost Boy," a Peter Pan tribute.  I love this song specifically because I think of it as more of a tribute to Bobby than anything.

The first few lyrics go...

There was a time when I was alone
Nowhere to go and no place to call home
My only friend was the man in the moon
And even sometimes he would go away, too

Then one night, as I closed my eyes
I saw a shadow flying high
He came to me with the sweetest smile
Told me he wanted to talk for awhile
He said, "Peter Pan, that's what they call me
I promise that you'll never be lonely, " and ever since that day...

And then we know the rest.

What I find ironic here is that Peter Pan the character, while often romanticized by girls and young women from all over, was essentially a sociopath who only came to take Wendy away with him because she was a good storyteller.  So I don't know how in his character these lines would be...

But it reminds me very much of Bobby, who was known as a friendly and sweet guy at almost every phase of life, even when troubled.  We also know from his mother and some others that he befriended underdogs consistently, so I love to think of this song as being about Bobby himself, as I would imagine him to act, rather than Peter Pan.

The fact that Bobby WAS Peter Pan, then, makes it all the sweeter.

Letter to Allen Ginsberg

Today I wanted to commentate on a letter from Bobby the webmaster of bobbydriscoll.net has been so kind as to share with us during the updates.  It's a letter that makes me super sad, for a number of reasons.

There are a few things that jump out to us right out the gate when reading this letter from Bobby to Allen Ginsberg in February of 1968.  For one, it was February 1968, which means Bobby had roughly a month to live.

You can read it here.

We don't know why he was in jail then, but we can imagine it was probably under charges not dissimilar from those in his past.  However, we can most certainly ascertain that his father was not in jail with him -- Clet, as far as we know, was back home in California, probably pining away for his only son.

Next, we see the names of the other two men Bobby mentions at the bottom of the letter:  Billy Sunday and Arch Obler.  The Billy Sunday I know of was a Presbyterian evangelist who lived the generation prior to Bobby's, but whom he might have had knowledge of given the fact that Bobby most likely grew up in a Presbyterian church (see one of my earliest posts about this).  There's always the chance that there existed another Billy Sunday, but he's mentioned in the same sentence as "Arch Obler," and there is only one of those that I know of, which is the screenwriter/playwright whose work Bobby would have probably been familiar with.  That leads me to believe the "Billy Sunday" Bobby refers to was, in fact, the noteworthy one we think of.

Why would Bobby tell Allen G. that he was in jail with his father, and that Billy Sunday and Arch Obler said to thank him?

My personal theory -- and the cause for my sadness regarding this letter -- is that Bobby's mind was either pretty far gone from his illness, or that he was high when he wrote it.  There are words missing and a couple of misspellings littering the manuscript that indicate that as well.  In Bobby's mind the way it probably was at the time, his dad, Arch Obler, and Billy Sunday could have all accompanied him to jail without question.

There is also, however, the possibility that this was some type of code language and code names for people both Bobby and Allen knew.  They shared the kinship of the Beat generation, which leads me to believe this is a possible explanation as well.

But, again -- I believe the date and the context behind what we know about Bobby's life in early 1968 indicates that the first theory is the one most likely.

I find myself haunted by questions of what Bobby's final months and even years were like.  We lose touch with him, or at least his personal words about his life, after he does the interview in 1961 regarding his great love for Suzanne Stansbury.  We all know what went with that eventually, and then we know Bobby "married" Sharon Morrill, but we never heard him talk about it...

Or his family talk about it....

Or what exactly happened when he got to New York and decided to stay there, apart from his plans to sell pot with Sharon's brother and, according to some sources, try to make it on Broadway.

He essentially became a ghost.

We see him on Andy Warhol's couch in one instance.... posing briefly for a picture in his overcoat, unsmiling on one occasion.... and of course, in his few minutes of "Dirt" where he played a nun for Warhol's short film.  But other than that, what did he spend his time doing?  What was every day life like for him?

Brian Keith O'Hara has said he knows from having gone up and investigated with some people who had encountered Bobby in Manhatten that he spent alot of time at the library.  We know from his poems, namely "For America" that he kept abreast of politics at the time, at least somewhat; and he seemed to have adapted to the fashion of the late 60's as well.  Was it possible for him to have been lost in a total fog of drugs, yet to have been socially conscious at the same time?  Addiction is such a different animal for everyone who encounters it....

Anyway, all that to say, there's so much we don't know about that time in Bobby's life.  But one thing's for sure, if he was being peppered by hallucinations in those last months, I pray they were comforting illusions -- and if he imagined the presence of his father, I like to think they were.

Bobby and Frances Farmer

This is a picture of Bobby and Frances Farmer, studying the script for Party Crashers back in May of 1958.

It's a reproduction on my phone of the actual photo I received in the mail today, and let me tell you:  wow.

In the actual picture, Bobby feels so close.  You can actually see all the little details, such as his acne scars, chapped lips, the hair on his arms... not glamorous things necessarily, but REAL things.  It truly brings the real person he was to life, and I am SO glad I spent money to get it.

Here it is!

"For America"

Guess what’s back??  Our favorite Bobby Driscoll site!  

www.bobbydriscoll.net

There are some updates including Bobby’s poems and also his artwork, which are great additions.  The uploads to youtube aren’t quite complete yet, but that’s okay.  When they come up, I’m gonna find a way to download youtube videos and download EVERYTHING, man.

I’d like to talk for a minute about Bobby’s artwork.  I have always felt a very personal connection to Bobby and who he was as an individual, but I can’t exactly “fake it” when it comes to his collages and poems.  I love the FACT that he did collages, because I love collages, but I honestly don’t “feel” any of the pictures Bobby did.  His poems, also, are beyond my interpretation.  I’ve wondered if this was because he was high most of the time by that point?  He was also known to be highly intelligent, so it could be that his intelligence is just far beyond this good ol’ simple girl’s brain.

I think they’re rife with symbolism, and I’m a super symbolic person myself, but I just can’t follow most of them.  However, today I want to point you in the direction of the poem he wrote called “For America.”

Btw, just go to the site and find it if you haven’t read it.  I don’t want to repost the words here because the book they came out of is owned by the site owner and I want to respect copyright stuff.

This is the only one I THINK I MIGHT discern the meaning of, and I wouldn’t swear to it.  I wonder if he’s telling people not to get all torn up protesting Vietnam and some of the other things happening in the 60′s, because it’s an issue that would pass like anything else…?  The very title of the poem alone, and its subject matter, would lend us to realize Bobby paid more attention to national news than I original thought he did during that time period.  I think what he might be saying is, don’t make things worse by getting riled up – the justice and things you are seeking by protesting are going to become apparent, you just have to wait for it.  Don’t lose yourself to hate.

What do we think?  I’d love to open up some discussion!  Who thinks they have mad interpreter skills?